Confronting Mortality: Lessons from a Cancer Diagnosis

The word cancer sucked the air out of the room. I stood with the phone in my hand, staring at my wife with tears welling up in my eyes. The room seemed to spin. We had waited for the biopsy results to return for days, and I opted to receive the message over the phone. The black line under my left thumbnail was a subungual melanoma.

 I had cancer.

Although the nurse on the other end of the phone assured me they had detected it early, and that they could more than likely remove it surgically. All that flooded my mind was the internet search results I scrolled through during the days of waiting. It was the first time in my life that I truly realized my mortality.

After hugging my wife tight, I went to my study and buried my head in the cushion of my chair. Fear strangled my thoughts, as I began to sob. My mind raced.

Would I see my son graduate? Who would walk my baby girl down the aisle? My wife and I have so many unfinished plans. We are supposed to grow old together. I don’t want to…

“God, I don’t want to die,” I said.

It was not an audible voice, but God spoke to me that day. He assured me that He was larger than even death, and that no matter what I could trust Him, not only my life, but my family’s future too.

In Genesis 50:24-26, Joseph faced death. However, Joseph trusted God’s promises to come to pass even after his death. God had shown his sovereignty to Joseph multiple times. His unwavering belief in God’s promise of Israel’s freedom from Egypt, even after his passing, inspires us to live with eternal hope.